Archives for the month of: February, 2010

A few weeks ago I was standing in the checkout line at the Sacramento Natural Foods Co-Op when a woman in a burqa joined the adjacent queue. It was off-white in color, like raw linen. It covered her completely, from head to toe. (I could just see her toes peeking out. She was wearing leather sandals.) I was standing next to her. I could hear her breathing. Her eyes were invisible behind a blank strip of gauze. Incongruously, hideously, it reminded me of Robocop.

I felt appalled. I felt ill. It was like suddenly finding myself next to a man wearing SS insignia and armed with a machine gun. No, that’s not right. It was like being next to an SS prisoner, with a yellow badge on her jacket and a number tattooed on her arm.

I wanted to do something. I wanted to say: Who did this to you? Take me to him and I will tell him a thing or two. But I did nothing. And I haven’t seen her since. But I promise you, next time, I will do something. I don’t know what. But I cannot, must not stand there again, afraid to act, afraid to help. I have to do something. This abuse must not stand. Not if I can do anything about it.

Here’s a useful rule of thumb. If they’re screaming in pain when you do it to them, it’s wrong.

Wonderful perspective on the bogus arguments used to support things like Prop. 8.

Human beings took our animal need for palatable food . . . and turned it into chocolate souffles with salted caramel cream. We took our ability to co-operate as a social species . . . and turned it into craft circles and bowling leagues and the Metropolitan Museum of Art. We took our capacity to make and use tools . . . and turned it into the Apollo moon landing. We took our uniquely precise ability to communicate through language . . . and turned it into King Lear.

None of these things are necessary for survival and reproduction. That is exactly what makes them so splendid. When we take our basic evolutionary wiring and transform it into something far beyond any prosaic matters of survival and reproduction . . . that’s when humanity is at its best. That’s when we show ourselves to be capable of creating meaning and joy, for ourselves and for one another. That’s when we’re most uniquely human.

And the same is true for sex. Human beings have a deep, hard-wired urge to replicate our DNA, instilled in us by millions of years of evolution. And we’ve turned it into an intense and delightful form of communication, intimacy, creativity, community, personal expression, transcendence, joy, pleasure, and love. Regardless of whether any DNA gets replicated in the process.